How to Spend Quality Time With Your Spouse, Especially When You're Busy
Photo by Micah Camara
How to Spend Quality Time With Your Spouse, Especially When You're Busy

We're all busy. Maybe we're busy working, raising kids or taking care of others, working toward our dreams while we work 9 to 5. Maybe we have a lot of social commitments.  

It's easy to feel like we're running on a hamster wheel. Always busy, but never really going anywhere or making any progress toward our dreams and goals. When we feel like we never accomplish anything or when we feel exhausted, frustration can set in. It can leave us feeling irritable or uninspired. And that can affect our relationships.

It's important that we work toward our dreams and goals so we don't let that frustration taint our relationships. But we also need to devote time to creating healthy relationships, especially with our spouse.

A spouse is a source of support, one who can encourage or inspire the other to realize his or her potential. When we give each other support, when we stand by and encourage each other to achieve dreams, we're creating an ideal environment for a healthy marriage.

But support is just one aspect. Not only do we need to support each other, but we also need to offer each other quality time. Quality time is time spent communicating thoughts and ideas.

It's easy to collapse on the couch and watch TV all night after a hard day at work, but that really isn't quality time. Ideally, all time spent with our spouse should be quality time, and while that might be the ultimate goal, it's ok to start small. Doing something special once a week is a good start.

So, while we're working toward our dreams and goals, here are a few ways we can work toward spending quality time with our spouse:

Play a game.

Instead of vegging out in front of the TV every night, play a game of cards or dice or a board game. It's more interactive, and it helps break the cycle of monotony that so easily weasels its way into our lives.  

Sit outside with a glass of wine (or other beverage).

Taking advantage of nice weather is a great way to spend some quality time with your spouse.

Chat over wine and cheese.

A nice little treat that can double as quality time is sharing a really good cheese and sipping wine.

Read a book together.

My husband and I have read faith-based books together. It's a great way to connect and share thoughts on particular subjects. It works better if there are questions or exercises at the end of each chapter to give you some talking points.

Take your spouse on a date.

Just because you're married doesn't mean you're done with dating. Go out for dinner and a movie, or visit a winery or brewery, or tour a museum or historic building. Check out the old black-and-white films at the Library of Congress theatre or try out a new café or bakery. There are a ton of places to go visit, and most don't cost that much (many are even free).

Those are just a few ideas to get you started. There are plenty of ways to turn vegging time into quality time with your spouse. Enjoy!

Jody Calkins
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