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The Key to Dealing With Rejection When You're a Writer

The Key to Dealing With Rejection When You’re a Writer

The Key to Dealing With Rejection When You're a Writer
Photo by Sophia Dzikas Photography

The Key to Dealing With Rejection When You're a Writer

Rejection hurts. There's no doubt about that. When we've spent countless hours on our stories, getting that form rejection slip in the mail feels like a stab to the gut. Our hopes and dreams are shattered. All that time just wasted…

But wait a minute. You signed up for the rejection. Didn't you know? When you picked up that pen or placed your fingers over the keyboard to write, you put your name on that rejection slip waiting list.

The simple fact that you tried to better yourself by picking up the pen hailed the "rejection givers". You're not alone. Everyone who takes some form of action stands at the feet of rejection at some point. It might not be right away, but just like clockwork, it happens. That's because they stuck their necks out of their little turtle shells.

Combine rejection with a pessimistic attitude and you'll never achieve your goals because you'll always think you'll be rejected. What's the point of even trying? You won't be successful anyway.

That's how I grew up. I grew up believing that success is impossible to achieve. My best bet, even though being self-employed is better because you aren't making money for someone else, was to get a job working for someone else… that's just the way it is. Success is just too hard to achieve.

My faulty belief system is what has kept me (until now) from working hard enough to actually achieve success. Writing is hard work, especially when you think you're writing for nothing, that you'll never be published and never be heard.

So, should we just keep our heads, feet, and tails inside that shell? That's up to you, but I bet you're not willing to put your writing dreams aside for something so ridiculous.

The thing is, rejection is just the nature of the beast… it comes with the territory. Dealing with rejection is in the job description. Everyone signs up for it without even knowing it. It's one of those things that assists your internal resistance in thwarting your goal achieving.

If you let the rejection get to you, you won't make it far in any business. I know just as much as anyone how hard it is to deal with rejection, but if we let it get to us, then resistance wins and the game is over.

When we realize that rejection is just a part of being a writer and that it doesn't necessarily reflect our talents, we can make the decision to move forward to achieve our writing goals.

A key to dealing with rejection is to not take it personally. Just do your best, send it out, and get started on your next project. The more practice you have, the better you'll become.

What's your best way for dealing with rejection? Do you still struggle with it or have you been able to overcome it?

Jody Calkins
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